I'm A Turkey

by Uncle Vin

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1.
I'm A Turkey 01:14
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Gobble gobble gobble gobble Gobble gobble gobble I'm a turkey, I'm a turkey I am a bird of courage Like Ben Franklin said But now i'm kinda worried Cause it's almost thanksgiving And the president forgot to pardon meeeeee Gobble gobble gobble gobble Gobble gobble gobble I'm a turkey, I'm a turkey If i see you on the street I might get aggressive If you're weaker than me I might just start peckin I even peck at my own reflection I don't even know why I do that I see this thing and it looks like me And I'm like "oh my god, you're beautiful" And then I just start pecking at it And I'm like "what am I doing? What am I, a silly goose? I'm not, I'm a turkey!" Gobble gobble gobble gobble Gobble gobble gobble i'm a turkey, i'm a turkey
2.
Awwww Shrimp 01:49
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Awwww shrimp Shrimp Shrimp are little creatures Antannae on their faces They live under the sea With all the other crustaceans  There’s all kinds of shrimp  Regular and jumbo You can find em in New Orleans Swimming in your gumbo Shrimp Awwww Shrimp Shrimp are really delicious I bet they wish they weren't That way they wouldn't get eaten as much And they could just chill out at the bottom of the water Now I got shrimp in my soup There’s shrimp in my burrito Shrimp in my Chinese food Shrimp in my risotto Shrimp Awwww Shrimp You can eat em when they’re hot You can eat em when they're cold You can even put em in your milk If you’re a total weirdo 
3.
Howler Monkeys 01:54
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They hang out in the trees They swing from vine to vine They never let me sleep You can hear em for miles and miles The howler monkeys The howler monkeys The howler monkeys Keep howling at me Some grow to four feet tall They use their tail like an extra arm And they make quite a sound  Sounds like the devil is coming to town The howler monkeys The howler monkeys The howler monkeys Keep howling at me
4.
Snake In The Grass 01:50
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Snake in the grass Snake in the grass Well I went for a hike just the other day When I saw something slithering up my way I saw it’s fangs and I heard it’s rattle I turned around and I skedaddled That rattle really really rattled me I ran down the mountain into the sea I'm glad I escaped Cause I don't like snakes Snake in the grass Snake in the grass Well I was taking a bath just the other night Trying to unwind by candelight When a snake crawled outta my toilet bowl I said jeepers creepers I better go I ran down the street screaming oh my god My neighbors called the cops they think I'm odd But I swear on meemaw's graveI saw a big ol snake It was crazy Craziest darn thing I ever seen Then  I was mowing my lawn just the other day When I saw something slithering up my way I said holy smokes is that you again The snake said yep sure is my friend  I thought that snake was really talking to me Turns out I was just hallucinating Cause he bit my foot Now my brain's kaput I don't... I don't know anything anymore I just keep seeing snakes everywhere I go It's very unusual I should probably go see a doctor
5.
Ribbit 01:52
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Ribbit, Ribbit, Ribbit, Ribbit I am a frog I live in a bog It's very humid, if I had hair there’d be a lotta bad hair days I’m never sad On lily pads  They’re kinda what you’d call my “safe space” Very relaxing, super chill I like to leap away from bad guys Yeah I can leap up to 20 times my own size It's all in the tendons, people The tendons and the webbed feet I’ve got eyes Off to the sides Don’t think I can’t see you making fun of me cause I can I can totally see it I catch flies Out of the sky  You thought Gene Simmons had a long tongue? Forget about it, that guy's a washed up loser  I like to eat whatever I can Spiders and worms, and sometimes my lil froggy friends Okay I realize that sounds bad I know you’re thinking “Heyyy, mr. cannibal over here!" But hear me out okay? I’m just saying, it’s a frog eat frog world out there people You gotta look out for number one or you just might come out in someone’s number 2 I am a frogI live in a bog I am a frogI am a frog
6.
The G.O.A.T. 02:20
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Goats are the greatest of all time The greatest of all time That's why I love goats Goats are the greatest of all time At least in my mind Nothing puts a smile on my face faster Than watching some goats roaming round in a pasture If you got a goat bring it over please So I can milk your goat and make goat cheese Goats are the greatest of all time The greatest of all time That's why I love goats Goats are the greatest of all time At least in my mind Dancing on your back at the yoga class Mowing up your lawn yeah they're eating your grass Little devils with cute horns on their heads At this point does it even need to be said? Goats are the greatest of all time The greatest of all time That's why I love goats Goats are the greatest of all time At least in my mind
7.
I Wanna Ride An Elephant 02:16
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I wanna ride an elephan I wanna ride an elephant (Right through the desert) I wanna ride an elephant  I wanna ride an elephant with you We’ll stampede the poachers Who wanna take their tusks Pardon my language But those guys really stink  Death to the poachers Death to the poachers I want to ride an elephant with you They'll never forget me or you Let’s make memories like elephants do I wanna ride an elephant I wanna ride an elephant  Right through the jungle We'll feed them peanuts We’ll pet their wrinkled trunks We’ll tickle their ears Then go out on the hunt Death to the poachers Death to the poachers I wanna feed an elephant  I wanna feed an elephant with you
8.
Little Kitty 02:24
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Little Kitty I can hear you purr As you scratchin Up our furniture Little Kitty Why don't you go scratch your post We spent 17 dollars on it Little Kitty In your litterbox  Makin stinkies  Kickin your doo doo rocks Little Kitty This is why we can't have nice things Always fighting with your brothers and sisters Seems like you never learned to share We tried to teach you all kinds of things But as usual you didn't even care Little Kitty I can hear you purr As you're dreaming Bout killing all the birds Little Kitty Tiny little sociopath I know you meant to break that glass Little Kitty Come sit on my lap Little Kitty We could take a nap Little Kitty Why are you walking away? Come on, hey, hey hey Little kitty Are you happy Little kitty Do you love me Little kitty I hope you enjoy your new home A countryside to roam
9.
Man's Best Friend 02:06
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Dogs are man's best friend They'll love you til the end They'll never let you down No poodle or any hound Cause dogs are man's best friend They'll love you til the end They'll never leave your side Until the day they die They lick your face when you're feelin sad Fetch your paper if the news ain't bad Let you know when there Is a burglar at your back door Cause dogs are man’s best friend They’ll love you til the end No matter where you go  They’ll always follow They’ll help you dig if you need help with that  Fetch your slippers while you lay in bed Let you know when thereIs a fire at the old mill Good boy! Ha ha Thank God That mill employs half the town! What?? The economy would be destroyed! And oh the precious memories That we shared back in that old mill  They would all go up in flames So thanks buddy you really saved the day You’re the best You’re a good boy I love you so much Cause dogs are man's best friend They'll love you til the end And long after that Their love is infinite
10.
I Like Eagles 02:26
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I like eagles Soaring in the sky They always make me Wish that I could fly High like eagles Spreading out their wings Over the harbor Seeing what the new day brings They're a symbol of freedom All over the world They're a symbol of freedom For all the boys and the girls And every gender in the world I like eagles But not the football team Or that old rock band I don’t get their whole thing But I like eagles Soaring in the sky Over the mountain  Hunting with their eagle eyes They're a symbol of freedom All over the world They're a symbol of freedom For all the boys and the girls And every gender in the world No matter what Ben Franklin said Ben Franklin doesn't know everything And he’s dead
11.
I'm A Turkey (Tryptophanatic Remix) 01:58
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about

Turkey

Slang. a person or thing of little appeal; dud; loser. a naive, stupid, or inept person. a poor and unsuccessful theatrical production; flop.

At 41 years old, in the middle of a global pandemic, national unrest and societal upheaval, only one man would be brave enough to record a follow-up to his debut album of animal songs, "Hop Around Like a Bunny" (an album which garnered several compliments, I'll have you know), just in time for the holiday season...

...and that man is ME. Uncle Vin. Hi everybody.

I don't really know why I made this. I'm not sure it's for kids. Or adults. It's for me, basically. Whatever I am. It was fun though. Fun is the most important thing, I think.

So maybe I AM a turkey.
And if I am, so what?
So what if I'm a turkey?
I'm a turkey who knows how to have fun.

credits

released December 25, 2020

Vincent Brue: Everything except
Steve Honoshowsky: Drums

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Uncle Vin New Jersey

Uncle Vin is your weird uncle who writes songs about animals and monsters and stuff.

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